Hurting

A friend of mine just had a miscarriage. It's weird that I've known people who have had them before, but this time it hits me harder. Because I am pregnant it just breaks my heart even more. I don't really know what to say to be comforting. Part of me feels bad because I still get to carry my baby and she doesn't. I just wish I understood why some babies never make it out of the womb. Why create them in the first place just to have them lost before they ever come out? I know that God has His reasons and that He uses these times ultimately for His purpose, but aren't there other ways to show us what He wants? These are the times that I just don't understand Him, but I do still trust Him.

Sleep

I am not sleeping well lately. Possibly because I am going to sleep at the same time as my husband or before. So I fall asleep between 8 and 9. Then, I get too much sleep, but I also wake up a lot. I guess I better get used to it. I'm worried that it's going to be forever before I sleep well again. I've been up since 4:30 am. I'm really looking forward to being a mom, but I'm worried at how my attitude and personality will be with even more lack of sleep. I'll just have to turn to God even more to get me through the days.

It's Been Awhile

Well, I'm about six months pregnant! I am really anxious for him to get here. And yet at the same time, I still feel like there's so much that has to be taken care of first. It's a little stressful. I feel like something is missing sometimes. Like there is something that I have been waiting for for so long and it is just out of my reach. I know that he is inside me but, part of me feels like I won't be whole until he's here where I can touch and see him. I know it sounds crazy but, it's just what I'm feeling right now.