Playing Dumb

Luke 24:13-35

This is what John preached on in church today. Jesus had just resurrected from the tomb. He came up behind two men and just walked with them. The interesting thing is that He didn't tell them who He was. He just asked them questions about what had happened recently (like He didn't already know). These men were really broken about Jesus' death. They told Him that they were hoping that He was the one who was going to redeem Israel. Jesus walked with them and talked with them until they got where they were going. Jesus was going to keep going, but they insisted that He stay with Him.

John brought up the point that maybe Jesus played dumb with them in order for them to work out the pain that they were feeling. They were so heartbroken by His death that they just needed time to work through it and just ask questions and to vent about all that had happened. Jesus didn't just come right out and tell them who He was. He let them work through their pain and spoke to them in an encouraging way.

When we go through things that are hard, it is only in God's timing that we get over them. He knows that we sometimes need time to work through the pain of everything, but He is always there to guid us through it.

John also brought up the fact that these two men didn't want Jesus to leave at the end of the night because they had had such a great time with Him. It's kind of like the end of a really great date when one person has to get home and neither one wants the night to end because it's been such an amazing time. Maybe that's how these men felt with Jesus. They would do anything to make Him stay so the night lasts a little longer. I've definitely had times in my life that I didn't want to end.

Jesus wants us to be closer to Him. Another thing I heard today was that when we ask God to allow us to grow closer to Him, we don't really expect Him to do it. We get this "if it's your will attitude." It's totally His will above all else that we have a close relationship with Him. Of course, if we ask Him for it, He'll give it to us. He came here and died because He wants a relationship with us.

Sorry if I was all over the place, but I was just trying to get it all down before I forgot some things.

Unnatural

I have not had a great prayer life lately. I don't do it as often as I used to, which was constantly. And when I do do it, it just feels so unnatural. It's like I don't know the Person I'm talking to. I feel like a stranger and that I don't have the right to say anything. I don't feel the connection. And I know that it's totally my fault because God is always there and listening. I know He loves me and I know He wants me to talk to Him and He wants to talk back. I do love Him too, but I feel like we are so far apart right now. Thank goodness that God is not changed my our emotions.

I am a very emotional person and a lot of my relationship with God has been emotional. But it has also had a solid foundation to the point where no matter how I felt, I still knew the truth and never believed for a second that He wasn't there. I am still not convinced that He is not there, but I am not as confident as I once was. I want a relationship with Him. I want Him to be my everything again because I love Him and I will not go back to the way I was before Him.

I need to stop being lazy. I need to stop waiting for someone else to figure out what they are going to do and just go ahead and do what I know I should be doing. I need to be working with youth in some way. I need to be investing my time in teenage girls because that's what I have been called to do. Even though I am not as close to God as I used to be, I still believe that is where I am called. It's time to stop being selfish with my life because it isn't really mine, it is God's. I gave it to Him years ago because I needed Him. He wants to give me an abundant life and so far He has.

I'm ready to get back to my abundant life!

Passion

You know how there are songs that are just so powerfully sung you are just moved by them. I heard John Gallagher Jr. sing one tonight. It's called "The Goodbye Song" by Joe Iconis. Something Jess said to me about Rent has stuck with me for a long time. She said you can see how much they love doing it. That is how it was with this song. John put so much passion into it he made you feel something. I wish I knew what God wanted me to do with this heart for celebrities and theater. I mean I know I could pray for them, but that doesn't seem like it's enough. I want to know them. I feel so connected to them through their singing voices and the passion with which they sing. I hardly ever get that when people sing about God. Where's the passion, people? Where's the belief in what you're singing about? Why is it that people who may not even believe in God can sing about something with such passion that it makes you want to cry, yet we can't be the same way when we sing about the One who gives us life and passion? And they're really aren't a lot of songs out there that embody a passion for Christ. Most of them sound the same and there's no meat to them. What I wouldn't give to see a Christian artist be as passionate as John Gallagher Jr.